Thursday, January 8, 2009

cold and low

Wreched depression is trying to wrap its wirey little claws around my neck again. I start to feel dead. Like not doing anything. Not cleaning. Not cooking. Not working. Not creating. Not loving. Just nothing.

At this particular point I am wondering if it is because I am not where I am supposed to be in my life. I am wondering if God has given me impossible ideas and actually expects me to carry them out. Does He really want me to climb out on this thin limb and jump with no wings? Seriously?

My life is becoming toxic. Where I work. Who I am around. What I breathe. What I hear. Maybe jumping is the only cure. What if jumping is the only cure?

photo by hightowerstudio on etsy.


Lobster and swan said...

hey, be strong and keep your head above the black cloud.

Sometimes I have to really to stop myself being pulled down with feelings like this. It may not sound like much, but I find that completely cutting out sugar and caffeine can ease the misery a bit.

Couldn't find your email so hope its okay to leave this message here : )

Miz.November said...

Thank you dear. Indeed, cutting out sugar does ease the pain a tad. And your thoughtful words warm my heart.

P said...

Hope you are feeling better - winter can be such a depressing, spirit-crushing time. I find that going to a gallery or museum helps me - being surrounded by beauty is very healing.